The weekend that never was

It must have been Friday when I received an email from Ashish asking whether I would be interested in a night trek up to the Torna fort. Just two days before that I had decided to go on a bike ride and trek to Rajmachi. I emailed Ashish back telling him that it wouldn't be possible as I wouldn't be back till late in the evening on Saturday and wouldn't be able to join in on the trek.

Friday evening I headed to Life Cycles with Srikanth to rent a bike for the ride the next day. We rented two bikes and cycled back. Left home the next morning at around 4:30 AM to meet Bani at Swargate and then continue on to meet the others and head to Rajmachi. After about two hours of cycling and riding on the National Highway for about half an hour, I decided that I didn't want to compete with the trucks and lorries to get to Lonavla and preferred to head back. On the way back, I remembered Ashish's email and thought of maybe heading to Torna.

I suggested this to Srikanth, who thought it was a brilliant idea! Riding back, we rode past E-square theater on University Road. I hit the brakes, left my bike and ran in to see if there were any movie tickets available. I was looking forward to watching 7 Khoon Maaf but as the show was sold out I had to settle for I Am Number Four. After the movie and after stuffing myself with caramel popcorn and a sandwich, we headed to Life Cycles to return the bikes.

After returning the bikes, we headed back, had lunch and I fell asleep. I woke up at 3:30 and decided that I would head to Torna. Ashish said that we would bike to Torna (this time motorbike!) and then hike up from the base.

At 4:30 PM we met at Swargate and set off for Torna on 3 bikes. I was riding with Chikita, while Ashish and Arti were on one bike and Anoop and Srikanth on another. I was extremely excited about going on this trek. One because Rajmachi hadn't quite worked out the way it was supposed to and two because it was a night trek and I was told that Torna was beautiful! :)

We arrived at the base of Torna at around 7:30. We ate dinner and started walking a little after 8:30. Right at the beginning there was a fork in the trail and we chose the trail that we thought was the right one. Using our flashlights and the light from the moon we continued on the trail. After about 2 hours of walking, we realized that at some point we had taken the wrong path. Torna was slightly confusing as there were several trails leading out but many of them ended in a dead end and only one of them led to the top. We figured that if we continued moving up we would eventually hit the actual trail and could then follow it up to the fort. So, we continued walking in the direction of the fort.

Soon we were forcing our way through bramble and thorny bushes. We climbed over a dry waterfall that only had rocks in it. We continued climbing and walking. As we continued walking, the trail became harder to follow and the climbing and walking became harder. The inclines were steeper, the pathways were slippery and there was nothing to hold on to.

We finally came to a climb that was about 60 degrees and smooth stone. Somehow, with pushing, pulling, crawling and scrambling we came to stable ground. The next climb was almost 90 degrees and it took all our strength and a lot of motivation and even more faith to climb that rock face. There were six of us huddled on a small strip of flat ground and yet we were still not at the top of Torna. It was almost 2 AM at this point and Ashish tried to scout out the trail to the top and returned thinking it was safer and better to try and head back down.

Arti, Chikita and I were in disbelief. We had no clue how we had just reached the top and climbing down the way we came was almost unimaginable. After 5 minutes of an uncomfortable silence and all of us making up our minds that we had no other choice, we started climbing down. We decided we would follow a particular order until we came to flat ground and were more comfortable.

I swear, for the next hour or so, we were all holding our breath and hoping that we would get to the bottom without any major glitches. Srikanth lead the way, followed by me, then Anoop and Arti and lastly, Chikita and Ashish. As the inclines were so steep and the ground so slippery, we had no choice but to slide and crawl down the slope. After every section we stopped to make sure everyone made it and then continued further. It was amazing that everyone was so calm and collected on the outside, while I'm sure on the inside their heart was racing and while their mouth is saying, "Everything is going to be OK," their mind was still wondering if everything would go off smoothly.

After about 1.5 hours, we reached relatively flat ground and started walking through. In the meantime, we saw some other trekkers a little further off who had also gotten lost. We warned them to not come further and decided to head towards them. We finally got to them and they told us of their trek. We decided to rest there for some time and settled down to sleep.

We woke up to a biting cold, where our toes were freezing inside our shoes and we were shivering even with sweatshirts on. We started walking at 5:30 AM and headed back to the base village. Thankfully, we were able to find our way and a little more than an hour later, we were back at the base and happy to get there! :)

We had tea and headed back on our bikes. We ate breakfast on the way and headed back to Swargate. From there, I went home took a long shower and crashed.

After the trek, we laughed about the night and how eventful it had been. But at that moment, hanging off the tips of my fingers and hoping that my legs will find some solid ground, things were not so funny.

It was an amazing experience and I have newfound respect and appreciation for the five others that were on the trek with me. I think we now share something very different and special and I look forward to going on many MANY more treks.

I think the one thing that will make me want to go back with this very same group for any trek at any time would be the trust and faith. That night, I trusted every single person there and I think this was the only thing that let us all stay in such good spirits and it was the same thing that got us all safely to the bottom. I think it was so clear that we would all make sure that every single one of us would be safe and would get home safe. This was very very comforting and encouraging and made us push through any fears or inhibitions we might have had.

I think I owe everyone on the trek a big THANK YOU! :)

The Millenium's first decade in retrospect

Quick snapshot of this past decade! :)

2000 (New Years in Chicago)

- Appa joins the Foreign Service

- Moved to Germany

- Went on my first trip without family - Amrum (many firsts on that trip!)

- Played on a school team for the first time

2001 (New Years in Chennai)

- Was in my first play

- Travelled across Europe with family on a Eurail pass

2002 ( New Years in Chicago)

- Started learning tae kwon do

- Learnt rowing and rowed my first national competition

- Moved to Bangladesh

2003 (New Years in Chennai)

- My aunt got married

- Decided to become vegan

- Baked my very first birthday cake

- Went to Australia in the summer

- First time on the bungee trampoline

- Swam my first butterfly race

2004 (New Years in Chicago)

- My baby sister was born

- Moved to Calcutta

- Won my first national medals in rowing

2005 (New Years in Chennai)

- Finished my O-levels

- Won the single scull in both the junior and senior category at the West Bengal State Rowing Championships

2006 (New Years in Calcutta)

- Spent the summer in Germany and the US - again a summer of many firsts

- Visited the hospital I was born in Dubai - New Dubai Hospital

2007 (New Years in Calcutta)

- Finished my A-levels

- Turned 18!

- Started my BA in Sociology at MOP Vaishnav College For Women in Chennai

- Stayed in a hostel for 3 months

- Moved in with my grandparents for the year

- Won my first All-India University rowing medal in Chandigarh

2008 (New Years in Mumbai)

- Moved back with my parents

- Became an executive member of the Student Council in college

2009 (New Years in Chennai)

- Spent the summer interning in Melbourne

- Went to my first Aussie football match

- Became President of the People's Club in college

- Won gold in the single scull at the All-India university rowing championships

These are just some of the things that happened this past decade. We'll have to wait and see what the next decade has in store! :)

Goodbye 2010!

It is the last day of the year and the decade and looking back it has been an incredible year and quite an unforgettable decade! :)

What was Meena upto in 2010?

- Won the coxed fours at ARAE in Chennai

- Finished my BA in Sociology from MOP Vaishnav College For Women, Chennai

- Passed in First Class

- Visited my great grandmother in Tuticorin

- Traipsed around Singapore for a few days to relax, recuperate and shop

- Proud owner of a MacBook Pro thanks to my grandparents

- Joined Teach For India

- Started teaching 3rd grade at Rashmi English Medium School. Have a wonderful class of 24! :)

- Learnt how to cook

- Turned 21! :)

- Spent my birthday at Hard Rock Cafe in Bombay with some of my favorite people! :)

- Own my first car

- Prerna came to visit in Pune

- Nikki came to visit, watched a Hindi movie together and had an unexpected start to a milestone weekend

- Moved to Pune and moved into my very first apartment

- Trek to Koraigad with an awesome group of friends

- Went on an overnight trek to Rajmachi

- Cycled to Khadakwasla

- Visited Hyderabad after many years and had a wonderful visit

- Ran my first 10 K at the Pune Marathon

- Ran my first half marathon at the Goa River Marathon

- Attended home boi's wedding in Vizag! :)

- Family got a new Swift and I was the first to drive it!

We'll have to see what next year has in store for me! :) :)

Looking forward to 2011...

Investing stakeholders

Wednesday was an extremely eventful day to say the least.

The day started off with me going to school, just like any other day. We were told we would have to attend some Zilla Parishad training for two whole days, all in Marathi. Of course, we were ecstatic about the training! ;)

There was this hope that I would only have to go for half the day after school, but our Principal had a change of heart and wanted me to attend for the full day. So around 10 AM I headed to a nearby school and sat down among about 150 English and Hindi medium teachers for a 7 hour long Marathi "bashan" on the new ZP format for assessing our students!

Following the training, I walked out with the hope of heading to a Western classical performance. I put my key in to open my car door, took it out, sat in the car and looked at my key. The key was slightly bent. I touched the tip of it and it snapped into two and I was just left staring at the key that was now in two pieces.

One of the teachers from my school was with me and I was supposed to drop her back home. I was like um... there's a slight problem. My car key just broke and is now in two pieces. Then I showed her the key. We decided to find a chhabi wala close by to get a duplicate key made. We started walking and about 5 minutes later learnt that if we went into the Yerwada market, we could possibly find one. After a good 15 minute walk, we found a chhabi wala who was willing to make a duplicate key.

When asked how much it would cost, with no hesitation he said Rs. 150. I, for one, had only Rs. 40 in my wallet at that time. Yes, I know, just wonderful luck! We successfully bargained him down to Rs. 40 to make the key. YAY for bargaining skills! :) With a key in hand that would hopefully work, we headed back to the car. Once back, I tried opening the car door and couldn't.

We tried all kinds of things, including shaking the car to get the door open, but it just didn't work. By this time, the other teacher's uncle had come to pick her up. They were nice enough to go back to the chhabi wala, pick him up and bring him to the car. The key by now was bent and out of shape. He fixed the key and 2 minutes later had the car door open. Amazed I started the car and headed to drop the other teacher off at home.

Once at her home, she insisted that I come in and spend a few minutes, so I went into their house. A nice, quaint house and such a warm, welcoming family! It was amazing how the whole family called me in with smiling faces and such affection. They insisted that I have dinner with them but I told them that I would have to head out as it was getting late.

After about an hour, I walked out of the house and headed to my car. As I was driving back home, I was just thinking how wonderful it was to visit their house and how welcoming and affectionate they all were. We talk about investing stakeholders all the time but how many of us take it to heart. I'm pretty sure no one would have told this teacher anything about investing stakeholders but she just did it. I think that at the end of it, I felt that we should not look at ourselves as being different from the other teachers in our school, or feel different but rather just look at the wonderful things that they offer and the things that we can learn from them. If you look hard enough, there is something we can learn from every single person we meet! :)

City of Angels

Do you believe that each one of us has an angel watching over us? Do you believe in heaven? Do you believe that its important to feel pain? Do you believe its important to know what a pear tastes like? Or.....do you believe it would all be better if you could hear music when the sun rose and live in blissful ignorance?

"And I don't want the world to see me,

Cuz I don't think that they'd understand,

When everything's made to be broken,

I just want you to know who I am"

"And you can't fight the tears that ain't comin,

All the moment of truth in your lies,

When everything feels like the movies,

Ya, you bleed just to know you're alive..."

Today was the first time I watched City of Angels. I didn't know what to expect and neither did I expect this song. For some reason, I thought there was another song in this movie that never played and was pleasantly surprised when this one did. One of my favorite songs, I now understood what it meant and how it could mean so many more things. Definitely an interesting watch for the heart! Makes you question and wonder....and wonder and question...those simple things in life that we take for granted...makes us think of our struggles and the many things that we choose to ignore...the many things that we struggle to come to terms with...the many things that we grapple with on a daily basis....but it also makes us think about the simple things in life...the things that make life worth living...the things that make life so special....the things that make us human....and the things that only humans have....

Food for thought...or rather exercise for thought....five minutes later I was pulling away at my ergometer...guilty for not waking up early enough in the morning to finish my workout...on the other hand, thankful for the order of events...allowing my mind to literally wander to the heavens and back while I rhythmically pulled at the handle of the ergometer.

The sweat mixed with the pain gave a strange sense of pleasure and satisfaction...a high that only exercise could give....a fulfillment that only physical strain could deliver!!! For this feeling, I wake up every morning...for this feeling, I drag my tired body out of bed and pull on my sneakers...for this feeling, I go through the pain and the strain at the end of a hard day.......for nothing as wonderful as the oxymoronic pleasurable pain was unleashed from Pandora's box....

Tomorrow is a new day, where I wake up looking forward to feeling this pain all over again...looking forward to my screaming muscles and my aching lungs....looking forward to the meter counting down and the time ticking away....looking forward to the rhythmic spinning of the flywheel...stroke after stroke....minute after minute....the small things in life make life worth living and the angels watching are really missing out on something special!

My Sunday rollercoaster

Today, just like everyday, was a rollercoaster ride...yes, I didn't even step out of my apartment...but as we all full knew, TFI was going to be a rollercoaster ride...and just when you thought you couldn't go any faster or the drops couldn't get any steeper...they just always do!

And just when you think you can breathe again, you come up to another drop so quickly you don't have time to catch your breath.....and so it was today....

I set out with the objective of finishing up all my pending school work and clearing the boxes in my house...at the end of the day, I can say I was pretty successful...I've cleared pretty much all the boxes and have almost put everything away.....I've finished some of my pending work...still have a little more....I guess will just have to take care of that tomorrow!!!

And hopefully the rigorous rowing on the ergometer will start tomorrow....who knew that the day would turn out the way it did!

Amazing how random things can change your mood...change the way you feel....change everything....

The end of the day leaves me in turmoil...with the rest of the world and with myself....the end of the day leaves me more unsure of what I want to do....more unsure of what I think....more unsure of what I feel....the end of the day finds me dazed and looking for answers where there are none...asking questions where there is no one to listen....not asking the right questions...afraid what the answers might bring....

"Lost and insecure,

You found me, you found me,

Lying on the floor,

Surrounded, surrounded..."

"Where were you...

When everything was falling apart....

All my days...

Were spent by the telephone...."

Only time will give the answers to all the questions...only time will heal all wounds...only time will keep me in check....only time only time only time...."lost and insecure, you found me, you found me...."

The last two months at Teach For India has really made the most amazing memories for a lifetime...it has also brought back many many memories, both good and bad, from the extremely eventful past 21 years.

Five weeks at Institute really got me thinking about things that I had just pushed to the back of my mind and chose not to deal with or think about. The same thoughts kept popping up time and again. I still haven't found in me the courage to face these things but I think I am one step closer to being at peace with myself, at least about certain things.

Maybe this was another reason for starting this blog! Just a thought....for life has changed so much in the last two months...almost as much as it has every other year of my life. Though college seemed quite the same from the first year to the last, it changed quite a bit every year, with people coming and going and emotions...

It is that which makes us all so human and vulnerable...EMOTIONS!!!! I think when you are put under extreme pressure and are pushed to the breaking point, that is when the things that you deem the most important in your life come to the forefront. It is then that you realize how valuable certain things are, what your values actually are, what your faults and weaknesses actually are....and how there is a whole world out there! Many a time I think we all get so wrapped up in our emotions and are caught in this bubble that we fail to see that there is so much more to life...but then that just makes life all the more complicated....more choices, more options, more opinions!

Given the multitude of things that are happening I find myself unable to deal with any of the issues that I am battling in my head. But then again, wasn't that always why I kept myself so busy? I know that very soon things are about to start making sense.

Until then, this blog is an attempt to create some normalcy in all this mayhem! Perhaps it is only adding to it...

Why blog? Why now?

As most things in my life so far, some craziness came over me and I decided it was time to start blogging...and I have this gut feeling that this is not going to be one of those short lived passions of mine. Most things are not...I think that's why it becomes so hard cuz I just keep adding things to my life but nothing is really left behind...so add to the list BLOGGING!!!

Probably the craziness of turning 21! Now that I am an adult...officially...let's formulate some opinions, express them and they're hopefully worth listening to.

So from those who know me, they know I just can't stop talking. I think I had this irresistible urge to start a blog as I don't seem to have enough time to do anything anymore! Seemingly paradoxical I know. But true nonetheless!

I figured that there was so much that was running through my head...all the time...I've started writing many times and not pursued it further...but have really wanted to...so now I've decided to just start.

This blog is going to be random! Of course :) and only time will tell what it will comprise of....

So welcome to my blog! :) :) happy reading....TAKE THE PLUNGE!